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Harry: Hey Ron, what’s up?
Ron: Oh, there’s this new student, just transferred from Durmstrang, he got sorted into Griffindor so I’ve invited him to come and hang with us in the common room once he's got his timetable from McGonagall.
Harry: Cool, I didn’t think pupils were allowed to transfer!
Ron: Neither did I, but he moved to England with his parents and this is the only school here!
Harry: I guess that makes sense...
Ron: Oh, here he comes! His names Cecil by the way
Cecil: Hey guys, what’s up?
Ron: Hey Cecil, nothing much, this is Harry by the way, Harry Potter.
Cecil: Cool, hey Harry, how’s it going?
Harry: Good thanks, you?
Cecil: Good, good... So, what kind of music you guys into?
*Harry and Ron look at each other*
Harry: Music??
Cecil: Yea, you know, Rock, Metal, Jazz, Swing, Blues...
Ron: Erm, Cecil, I’d keep it down if I were you...
Cecil: Why?? What’s up with you guys?? Don’t you like music or something??
Ron: Sssssssh!! Don’t use that word!!
Cecil: What?? Music??
Ron: QUIET!!!
Cecil: Why???
Ron: We don’t speak of such evil here! It is the sound that cannot be named!!!
Cecil: You mean I can’t listen to my music??
*Produces an mp3 player from his pocket*
Ron: Put it away!! Quickly!!
*But it was too late. Darkness crept through the room, suffocating it. Cecil dropped the player and ran... but there was no escape... he was pulled into the shadows... never to be seen again*
Harry: Wow that was close!
Ron: Yea! I guess that’s why they don’t let students transfer!
Dumbledore: *sings drunkenly* Nobody knows *hic* the trouble I’ve seen, *hic*, nobody knows my sorrow, *hic
McGonagall: *whispers fervently* Albus! Pull yourself together!
Dumbledore: Why? What’s the *hic* point??
McGonagall: You're setting a bad example for the children!
Dumbledore: What children!?
McGonagall: If you've forgotten, you're in the great hall at the beginning of the start of term feast!
Dumbledore: Oh sh*t! Really!? Well bugger me! I thought I was *hic* in my office!
McGonagall: You were when you started on the whiskey... that was four hours ago!!
Dumbledore: ow'd I get down ere then??
McGonagall: You apparated here a few moments ago! In a few minutes you have to give your speech! Try and sober up!
Dumbeldore: No need Prof.. proff...proff.. Minerva *hic*, I’ll do it now!
McGonagall: No, Albus!
*dumbledore stands up to address the students who all fall silent*
Dumbeldore: Nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak!! Thank you!!
*Great Hall erupts in applause and food appears on the tables*
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Another random script...
Ron: Erm, Harry, can you tell me exactly how a fellytone works, I mean all the wires and stuff, you know, in muggle language
Harry: Ron, you know I’m not supposed to tell you anything new!
Ron: Oh pleeease Harry!
Hermionie: I'll tell you Ron, Harry's just being foolish
Harry: No! Hermionie! STOP! You've no idea what you're doing
*Hermionie, against all Harry's warnings, explains to Ron how the telephone network works*
Harry: Hermionie!!
Hermionie: What? Harry, I don’t think explaining to him how a telephone works will seriously damage him!
Harry: I wouldn’t be so sure...
Hermionie: Why?
Harry: You gave him new information about muggles!! You explained physics to him!!
Hermionie: So? Does it really matter??
Harry: *sigh* just watch!
*Harry and Hermionie watch as the thoughts in Ron's brain go round and round and round until finally.... POP!!*
Hermionie: Oh that’s gross!!
Harry: See what happened!! He started wondering how magic can exist when everything else in the world obeys the laws of physics!!
Hermionie: Well, that’s simple enough! Its magic! Its not the norm to muggles, they don’t know about it so their 'rules' cant apply to it!
Harry: Huh, yea, but Ron's brain cant process that!
Hermionie: *sigh* Oh alright, I wont talk about physics again, but what do we do with him now??
Harry: Well, I’ll re-attach his head, that’s simple enough, I’ve done it enough times! But you're cleaning up the mess, and teaching him how to read again!
Hermionie: Oh, alright! But at least I know how to shut him up now! |
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Random!!
Binns: Now class, we're going to have a short test today on 'the boy who lived', please separate your desks and take out your quills *passes test around*
Ron: *whispers* Hey, Harry, this should be a cinch for you, eh?
Harry: Yea, definitely!
*Next lesson*
Binns: I am going to hand you back your papers. The overall quality of the work produced by the group was excellent, however, a few people need to do some serious revision if they plan to pass this class.
*Passes tests back*
Ron: Oh yes! An O!! Cool!
Hermionie: Perfect score for me, yay!
Harry: Oh, yea... same here!
Ron: Show us your paper then Harry; let me check what I got wrong!
Harry: No... I don’t think so... check on Hermionie's
Ron: Erm, why??
Binns: Enough chatter you three!! Now, Mr. Potter, a D is nothing to be ashamed of! Even if the test was on you! However, I suggest you check what date your birthday is on... |
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Yet again... RANDOM!!
Harry: Professor McGonagal sent me to see you sir
Dumbledore: And why is that Harry??
Harry: I set the transfiguration classroom on fire
Dumbledore: Well... anyone could make that mistake Harry!
Harry: No sir, I meant to do it
Dumbeldore: Accidents happen my lad!
Harry: No sir, you don’t understand, it wasn’t an accident, I did it on purpose!!
*Dumbeldore sits down on his chair and sighs, burying his face in his hands*
Dumbeldore: I blame myself Harry!
Harry: What? No, sir, I...
Dumbeldore: Shh Harry, its all my fault! I should have told you sooner!
Harry: Told me what sir? What are you talking about??!
Dumbeldore: I should have told you that the transfiguration classroom was flammable!!
Harry: What?
Dumbeldore: Run along now Harry, and please... don’t think any less of me now you know the truth... I kept it from you to protect you, you were too young, far too young.... but now I see... you proved you needed that knowledge after your first year exams!
Harry: Hey! Are you saying I did badly!
Dumbeldore: I blame myself!! *starts sobbing hysterically*
Harry: Erm, oook, I’m gonna go now sir... good luck with your emotional problems...
Dumbeldore: Don’t be rude... I blame myself!!!!! !!
*continues crying hysterically as Harry runs out of the office*
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